Overwhelmed

These past couple of years have at times left me feeling overwhelmed. Our world changed overnight with the arrival of a new virus, and it brought chaos along for the ride. Social media, television, newspapers, highway road signs--literally everything we set our eyes upon--had COVID smeared all over it. Directives to do this, then that, then something else, left people confused, angry, and divided. Information changed daily, statistics reported questionably, fear controlled many, and there seemed to be no escape. I couldn't even go to the store without the reminder of it staring at me from a masked face. It was overwhelming.

Dictionary.com defines "overwhelm" this way: 
"to load, heap, treat, or address with an overpowering or excessive amount of anything"..."to overpower, or overcome, especially with superior forces; destroy; crush." 

The excessive amount of information continually given by the hour was overwhelming indeed, but the second definition really struck me. To "overpower...destroy; crush." At times I felt like giving up, quitting. Life was not as fun as before, and the dark side of humanity rose to the surface. I felt crushed by it all. 

Satan's goal is to see us destroyed, and he will use any and all means available to do so. He'll even use social media; a virus; a "mask debate." He works his way in and sucks us down the wormhole of division and defeat. If everything I see or read or hear overwhelms me, if he can direct my focus on the mayhem and disruptions, he has the power to destroy me. 

So where is my focus? What am I allowing my eyes and mind to linger on and take in? If I continually look at the things of the world, I will be overwhelmed. God tells us to look to Him; to keep our eyes on Him.

I was reminded of an old hymn we used to sing when I was a child. (Don't you love how God brings things to our remembrance at just the right times?) These are the words: 

Turn your eyes upon Jesus

Look full in His wonderful face

And the things of earth will grow strangely dim

In the light of His glory and grace

O Soul, are you weary and troubled?

No light in the darkness you see?
There's light for a look at the Savior

And life more abundant and free

Through death into life everlasting

He passed and we follow Him there

O'er us sin no more hath dominion

For more than conquerors are we

His word shall not fail you, He promised

Believe Him and all will be well

Then go to a world that is dying

His perfect salvation to tell

O, Turn your eyes upon Jesus

Look full in His wonderful face

Oh, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim

In the light of His glory and grace

What wonderful words of comfort! When we look to Jesus, the things of this world will dim and fade. If it's only darkness we see, He is the light that sets us free. And even in death, we are more than conquerors! We have everything to gain by looking to Him, and in doing so, we disarm Satan and his tactics. Feelings of defeat and inundation dissipate when we keep our eyes focused on Jesus. 

The definition of overwhelmed also means to be overpowered with "superior forces." It's easy to feel outnumbered and overcome by the dark forces at work in this world. Satan, his minions, and those under his influence are numerous to be sure, but in truth, God, His angels, and those following Him, greatly exceed any army of Satan's. 

In 2 Kings 6:8-17, the prophet Elisha continuously warned the king of Israel where the king of Aram would attack them next. These warnings saved Israel, but it angered the king of Aram. He sent his armies to find Elisha and surround his encampment, intent on capturing him. In the morning when Elisha and those with him awoke, His servant saw Aram's mass of soldiers, horses and chariots encircling them and panicked. How would they escape this overwhelming army? 

Elisha told his servant not to fear, for those who were with them were more than those against them. He prayed for his servant's eyes to be open to the spirit realm, and when they were, he saw the hillside filled with horses and chariots of fire. God's forces were present and far more abundant than the Arameans. As a result, the Aramean army was defeated while Elisha and the Israelites remained safe. 

At times, I wish my eyes could see the heavenly forces around me. If I could see the heavenly hosts fighting on my behalf, protecting me, shielding and guiding every footstep, how would it effect my life? Would I witness to others more passionately, pray more fervently, care for others more deeply? Would my fears vanish and the feeling of overwhelm dissipate? 

On rare occurrences God grants someone the ability to see beyond the veil of humanity into the spiritual, but they are by far the exception. The Bible tells us we walk by faith, not by sight. We must know our God and have faith in Him, without the use of our natural eyes. The story of Elisha builds our confidence and trust so that even in the midst of our own battle, even when things appear overwhelming, we have faith and know He is for us and with us. 

2 Corinthians 1:8-10 (NLT) tells us this: "8...We were crushed and overwhelmed beyond our ability to endure, and we thought we would never live through it. 9 In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead. 10 And he did rescue us from mortal danger, and he will rescue us again. We have placed our confidence in Him, and He will continue to rescue us." (Emphasis mine)

What an amazing passage! When I feel overwhelmed and crushed by the circumstances around me, when the troubles of this world are continually before my eyes, I must stop relying on myself--stop being self-sufficient, independent, trying to do it on my own--and rely on God alone. I can safely place my confidence and trust in Him knowing He has saved me in the past and He will save again.

In these days when the world feels like it could overwhelm and crush me under its weight, when I feel outnumbered in the battle, I will turn my eyes to focus more and more on Jesus. I will recall how God sent vast armies to protect His people and defeat their enemies. I will rely on the God I know and place my confidence in Him. If I am to be overwhelmed by anything, I want to be overwhelmed by Him and His love for me. 

How about you? Are you feeling overwhelmed by anything in the world? In your life? Turn to God and focus on Him. Be overwhelmed with His goodness and love towards you. He will never fail you. 

(Originally posted 8/28/20. Revised 7/28/22)

Pray Like You Understand, Because Maybe You Do

“Wow! I never thought about it that way before!

A number of years ago I had a “wow” moment with God which I’ve never forgotten. He is always teaching me things, but sometimes my learning moments are more memorable than others. When they occur, I always learn something new or see something old in a different way. This was one of those times.

The pastor of our church had been diagnosed with brain cancer. Although we hadn’t been a part of this congregation very long, we felt a strong connection to this man and his wife. They were not pretentious in their leadership role, but easy to talk to and we connected with them, so when his diagnosis was announced, our hearts were broken. That Sunday, the congregation joined together to pray for his healing and for God to be with them in the days ahead.

As I silently prayed from my pew, God began to bring words to my mind. They came quickly and with intensity, so I grabbed pen and paper and wrote as fast as I could. Sometimes I feel like I am God’s secretary, and He dictates faster than I can keep up! Sentences poured out, detailed and specific. Medical terminology specific to pastor’s condition were written; words that reflected knowledge down to the cellular level of a physical body. I stood and stared at it. I had never prayed like that before, and never had a prayer been so specific.

I was a nurse who had used my training for the treatment of physical conditions, but now my knowledge was being used for the spiritual. I Corinthians 14:15 immediately came to mind. "So what shall I do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will also pray with my understanding..." (NIV) I had read that verse many times before, but suddenly it rang anew in my mind. A light clicked on. In the past, I interpreted it to mean we should pray in the Spirit and also pray in English, or ones native, or understood language. But on this Sunday, God revealed something a little deeper to me. I could pray with understanding, true understanding.

Dictionary.com defines understanding as "the knowledge of or a familiarity with a particular thing; skill in dealing with or handling something." I had skill in the medical profession. I had a knowledge base that others didn't have. That specialized knowledge gave me the ability to pray very specific, very pointed words into the battle for our pastor's health and life. I had insight and mastery (command, expertise) in the cellular functioning of the human body and illness. When I prayed, I spoke with God-given knowledge; knowledge I had gained in my career, but now used for another purpose-- in-depth, targeted prayer.

You may not have a specific skill set such as a medical background, but you do have understanding in many other respects. God has gifted each one of us. We have natural abilities we are born with, and we have expertise acquired through various avenues of education. But we also have the knowledge we obtain through the "college of hard knocks." 

Some people experience domestic situations which are horrible. Some experience loss of property through storms or fire. Some experience homelessness, lost jobs and finances, or suffer physical ailments and crippling diseases. We all gather experiences, both good and bad. Two of my children died in infancy and I went through a debilitating experience with depression. I understand the trauma and pain of those situations to a greater depth than if they had never been a part of my life, and far more than someone who has never struggled with either. 

We only see the outside of people's lives while we try to imagine what they are going through. I have friends who have experienced a cancer diagnosis. I can empathize with them, but I do not have the ability to know what it feels like to hear those dreaded words the first time. I don't know what it's like to walk into the hospital for treatment which can cause sickness and pain in order to bring the hoped-for cure. I don't know what it's like to lose my hair.

I don't know what it's like to have my house burn to the ground with all my possessions and memories lost forever. I don't know what it's like trying to find immediate housing for my family, or to even find clothes to wear the next day. I don't know the trauma and heartache it brings. 

I don't know what it's like to lose a business or have my finances crash or have my spouse be unfaithful or abusive. I don't know what it's like to live with constant, unabating pain day after day. I don't know what it's like to experience those things, but maybe you do. You have an understanding that others don't. 

Our life experiences give us a unique knowledge base to use when we pray. We can pray in the Spirit as He directs, but we can also pray with understanding, insight into, expertise...mastery. Our prayers can be launched with pinpoint accuracy into a situation like a flaming arrow. 

To simplify; if someone asked me for food, I would give it to them. It may not be the exact food they hoped for, but it would be answering their request. If they asked me specifically for a creamy peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich on white bread with the crusts cut off, it is a much more specific request; one that can be responded to with great accuracy. When they obtain the desired sandwich, it builds their confidence that the next time they ask they will get what they hoped for. Their faith in the food provider is built. However, if they were having surgery the next day, I wouldn't give them food at all, no matter how specific or adamant their request. It wouldn't be good for them in that situation. In fact, it could cause them more harm than good. So even though their faith had previously been built up in the food provider, they now need to trust the provider to know what is best for them.

Prayer can be like the food analogy. We often pray to God rather generically. "Heal Mr. Brown." "Provide for the needs of the Smith family." There is nothing wrong with this as He hears all of our prayers, but we can do more. We have the ability to do real battle for a person's need or situation; we just don't realize we have the tools or weaponry to do so. We often negate the importance of our earthly knowledge base when it comes to prayer. We have the privilege of bringing our God-given talents and abilities--our understanding--not only into this earthly realm, but into the spiritual realm. Our gifts aren't just for the workplace or neighborhood, they are useful in God's kingdom.

Does it mean that when we pray with increased specificity God is obligated to fulfill our requests? No, not any more than any other prayer. God is still sovereign and rules over all, knowing far beyond our capabilities what is best. But it shouldn't deter us from using what He has gifted us with to pursue His best: to make requests or to fight for ourselves or others with all the wisdom and knowledge He has granted.

When someone hears you pray for them with understanding, your words can bring an amazing level of comfort. The knowledge of "I am not alone... someone truly understands," can bring immense reassurance to the hurting individual. It brings hope and healing. After I shared my written prayer with our pastor, he said it was the most meaningful prayer he had received. It was specific to what the doctors had told him, as well. It built his faith knowing that God did indeed know what he was experiencing and what his specific needs were. It brought comfort and reassurance to his heart and soul. Your prayers can do the same.

When we pray using precise words of understanding, we become keenly aware of when God answers our prayers in a specific way. For example, we can pray for someone to be healed, but if we pray for their white blood cell counts to return to normal levels within 24 hours and they do, we not only rejoice, but it builds our faith. It trains us to recognize that God truly does hear and answer our prayers and encourages us to trust Him even more.

God hears and answers all of our prayers; whether a whispered word, a cry of heartache, a shout of victory, or a detailed and pointed word we utter with understanding. He hears them all, but I love it when God shows me something different or awakens me to new ways of being used in His kingdom. I want to be an effective prayer warrior for Him, but warriors don't go into battle empty handed. They go armed. Prayer is one of those weapons we bring to the fight. We can bring our knowledge, our experiences, our expertise, and our understanding to the battle.

Others are waiting for you to come alongside and fight with them and for them. The next time you encounter an opportunity to pray for someone, bring your understanding with you into the spiritual realm. Amazing things will happen.

(Originally posted 8/15/20)

Why Do We Suffer? There IS a Purpose

This post has proven difficult to write. I have friends who recently plunged over the cliff of grief due to the sudden death of a loved one. Others I know have suffered for decades with physical ailments which cause daily pain and struggles. In writing about the hope we have through suffering, I want to use care. I do not want to disregard or diminish the anguish of those hurting.

I know what it is to be in the deepest valley alone with my demons. I know what it is to feel abandoned by God; to be angry with Him...to doubt He even exists. I know what it feels like to have someone throw Bible verses and pious platitudes at me which only served to make my guilt and anger rise. I know what it is to have my pain invalidated. Even though our tragedies vary, suffering is universal, and it hurts. 

I do not want to be like Job's friends. I don't want to add to anyone's pain, so I offer these words carefully and trust they are received with understanding. I want to share the hope on the other side of misery; to lend meaning to it.

I pray you will not be overwhelmed by the dark tunnel of suffering you may enter or get "stuck" inside that murky place. I pray you continue to move forward to the light that does come on the other side. I have been in the pit, and I have experienced suffering like I never thought I would. But God brought me out and I can tell you there is hope. There is purpose in our pain.

                                                                        ~~~~~~~~~~

"Give me one good reason!" "What is your excuse?" "What is the reason for my suffering?" "Why have You allowed this?"

We've all said these or similar words when something goes wrong. We want to know why. Why did this happen? Why am I made to suffer? Why was I "singled out" for this type of pain? Why___? (fill in the blank with your source of suffering) 

If I get a reason for my pain, I feel like it will be easier to accept, so in the midst of my suffering, I ask God why. But many times I don't just ask, I demand to know why. God "owes" me an explanation, or at the very least, a reason. I ask for an accounting, a motive, or even an excuse. I want justification for what I experience. I point my finger at God and want to know why I shouldn't be angry with Him. I want God to apologize to me.

Our friend Job lost everything he had: possessions, family, and health, all through no fault of his own. Many of us experience seemingly random losses or pain and like Job, and like him, we need to accept that we may never know the reasons why. Job faced the rest of his life without answers; with explanations withheld. He had to simply accept the sovereign plan of God in his life.

Still, we wonder. What possible good can come from our difficulties? The "good" lies within the purposes of God. 

Dictionary.com defines purpose as the "intended or desired result; end; aim; goal. The reason for which something exists or is done, made, used..." 

We are eternal creatures, and during our time here on earth we exist for the divine purposes of God. He is our Father--our Creator--and we are designed to fulfill His eternal plan on this earth. There is a goal to be achieved. If we cannot come to our pain and suffering with an eternal point of view, it will be hard to ever be at peace with it. It will be hard to accept it, and it will be hard to continue loving the God who allowed it into our lives. 

So why does God allow suffering?

He allows it because He is sovereign. He has an ultimate plan for this world and the people therein, and the main objective is to save people from going to hell. God is a loving father who doesn't want anyone to face eternal damnation, so everything He allows, even our suffering, has a divine purpose; to direct us and others toward Him and His saving love. Sometimes it takes hardship or pain to get us to go to the One who has the best plan for our lives. Sometimes we need to be broken to receive all He has for us. Sometimes we need to lead the way for others going through dark valleys.

Each of us are one piece of the entire picture, and every single person is vital. Just as the "butterfly effect" alleges that one flutter of its wings affects change throughout the world, so our lives--the things we experience and how we respond to them--have the ability to change our world and the people we encounter. Maybe the life of just one person is altered by our words or actions, and those changes ripple down to change others. It is impossible to know the effect we have on other human beings. I truly believe we will meet people in heaven who are there because of some seemingly small word we spoke, some small gesture we conveyed to them, or how we responded to the pain in our lives.

Our suffering brings us alongside others who also suffer. It opens a door--a community or brotherhood of sorts--where we can share the hope we have inside us. We can share our burdens and lighten the load of someone else. We have a witness inside our pain. 

God can use suffering to open our hearts to hear Him. People turn to God at incredible rates during times of tragedy or hardship. Even those who profess no belief in God are found crying out to Him. When sobbing and broken, the cry, "why?" may open ears to hear His voice for the first time. For Christians, Job 36:15 tells us that when we are afflicted, He delivers us through it, but uses the trial to open our ears to His voice. Sometimes the difficulties we endure shut out the world around us and we begin to hear Him more clearly. 

John 9:2-3 tells the story of the man blind from birth. Jesus' disciples asked Him who had sinned, the man or his parents that he should be born blind. Jesus responded that neither was to blame. The man had been born blind--suffered his whole life in darkness--so that the works of God might be displayed in him. Jesus then performed a miracle and restored the man's sight. We may not be the beneficiary of a miracle, but we have to remember that God is able. The blind man did not know he would receive his sight that day. He nor his parents had the knowledge beforehand that Jesus would visit them and bring him sight. Every day he lived in darkness, expecting nothing to change, but one day...everything changed. 

Our lives may have a "one day' just around the corner, too, but even if the miracle doesn't come, our suffering can be used to demonstrate God's work in us. In the darkness of pain, we can shine His light through it, perhaps helping others find hope in Him along the way. 

Suffering effects our faith. It can cause us to abandon our faith in God, or it can purify and strengthen it. During times of distress and pain, Satan slithers in, just like in the Garden of Eden, and whispers his lies and half-truths in our ears. If we entertain those thoughts, they take root and eventually lead us away from truth. Pain causes us to question God and His goodness. In these times, we need to anchor our hearts and minds in the truths of His Word. We need to shelter ourselves in Him, surround ourselves with those who will not only speak God's truth to us, but also confront the lies Satan tries to weave in. Suffering can be the tipping point of our faith. Satan wants to destroy it; God want to strengthen it. We choose which it will be.

Suffering can increase our trust in God. It's easy to give lip-service to our faith and trust when we have few challenges and things are going well. But when our world comes crashing down around us and we don't understand the agony we experience, will we still trust God? How deep is our trust? What is it dependent on? Will we trust Him no matter what our circumstances?

If we do not truly trust Him, there is no purpose to our suffering. We will never make sense of it, and it will fly in our face like a hard slap. But when we can come to Him, sobbing and angry and fearful and hurt, He is always there, loving us every second of every day. He will love us in spite of the mess we made of our lives, and in spite of the many times we go our own way. When we feel His pure love for us, when we experience His healing in our hearts and minds, trust grows. 

Does that mean we anticipate or look forward to the pain life may bring? No, of course not! But when we truly know Him--when we truly trust Him--we can walk through anything in life and know He is with us. We can believe He has a purpose in it, even if we never know the "why" of it. We can trust Him in the valleys of our life.

There are many unanswered questions in this world. Being a Christian doesn't give us the right to any answers. Like Job, we may have to go through the remainder of our days not knowing why things happen. We may never know the reasons. We may never get the miracle. But we can have comfort in knowing that God, in His divine wisdom, has a purpose for it. We are not lost or abandoned or punished just because we suffer. We are part of God's divine plan; a plan that brings glory and honor to Him, as well as hope and salvation to many who don't know Him. If our goal is heaven, and our hearts are trusting God, we can endure hardships in life because we know He has all things under His control. He has a purpose for each one of us; a goal to be achieved. 

Suffering is not what any of us want, but it is inevitable. If this post has angered you, or you don't believe one word of it, I simply ask you to revisit it at a later time. Your heart may not be ready to hear the words written here--I know mine wasn't for a long time. But there is a God who knows each of us intimately and calls us by name to the purposes He created us for. He will be waiting for you whenever you come to Him. Trust His love for you. Don't let your vision be blinded by the pain you feel. See beyond it. See your life through heaven-focused eyes. There is purpose in our pain. 

(originally posted 8/6/20)

 

Why Do We Suffer? Is There Hope? Pt. 2

Some people seem to skim through life unscathed by pain or difficulty; their lives full of joy, unencumbered with doctor visits, court dates, painful bodies, or emotional anguish. Others appear to have a dark cloud over them which never allows a moment free from trouble. Why? Why do some suffer more than others?

We may think some don't struggle, but we can only see the exposed part of a person's life; the things they reveal. Yet we know everyone suffers in some way at some time. Many sit silently in depression, or hide their troubles behind closed doors, or perhaps mentally wall off their pain because they cannot bear to have it come to light. Others are very open and transparent with their struggles. 

Whether outward and open for all to see, or hidden and entombed in shrouds of silence, we all suffer, and no matter how it comes to us, we always want a reason for the pain. Is there a reason? 

First, the actions of the first man and woman, Adam and Eve, cause all of us to experience the effects of a fallen world. We cannot escape pain because our world is not perfect; we are not perfect. One day this will be changed, thank God, but until then, we suffer. 

Secondly, choices. Those we make, and those others make, can lead to suffering. Poor lifestyle habits lead to illness and disease. Drunk driving leads to lifelong disabilities or death for the driver or the victims they hit. So many things can happen to us, and because of us. As a result, we encounter pain. 

Third, suffering comes to us because Satan blatantly seeks to destroy us. I Peter 5:8 says, "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (NIV) He hates us. The enemy of our souls will do anything he can to turn us from God and secure a place in hell for us for all eternity. God defends and protects us from many attacks launched by Satan, and we are taught to fight and defend ourselves using God's word, but sometimes there is another plan.

God allows us to endure suffering. One case in point is the story of Job.

Job was the victim of suffering so great that most of us cannot fathom the depth of pain he must have experienced. He lost everything. Family, vast possessions, health. EVERYTHING. Then to top it off, his "friends" came alongside and told him he must have done something wrong. They assumed God was punishing him. Instead of encouraging and helping their miserable friend, they essentially kicked the guy while he was down. 

So why did Job go through such horrific suffering and pain? Because Satan asked to "have at him." Job feared God, was blameless and upright, and shunned evil. Satan believed Job would curse God and reject Him if all his worldly wealth was taken away. He believed God's blessings were the only reason he remained loyal. In other words, he believed Job only liked God because he had a good life with lots of "stuff." So, God allowed Satan to remove everything Job had--possessions, family, and health--to within a breath of his very life. God allowed it. After a period of suffering, Job cried out and questioned God as to the reason for his misery. God succinctly responded by asking a few questions of His own, which put Job in his place. In the midst of his worst agony, he repented and humbled himself before the God he trusted and feared. He acknowledged the fact that he was the created, not the Creator.  In the end, God honored Job for his faithfulness and his heart, and all his fortunes and family were restored, twice as much as he had before. 

When we experience loss and suffering, it's easy to question "why." We wonder why we don't regain our things as Job did. "How come he got things back, but I didn't? Or we start to believe the devil's lies.

"God must not love me as much as He loves others."

"He 'has it out' for me." 

"He's picking on me."

"I'm not worthy to have His blessings."

"I must have done something wrong." 

We become Job's friends to ourselves. I thought many of those things after the death of my two children, and I did wrestle with God as to why He allowed my pain. I did wonder why Job got his stuff back, and I didn't. 

Ah, the perils of comparison! But God's plan for each person's life is unique and individual. What He has for one is not what He has for another. I cannot demand God give me what He has given someone else. The root behind it is jealousy, envy, and discontent. Sin. I cannot covet what my neighbor has, even when it doesn't seem fair. Even when I remain faithful to God, but my neighbor isn't, I cannot compare. I have to run to God and ask for His mercy. To help me see things through His eyes. To trust Him more than before. To surrender to His ways.

Satan will stop at nothing to destroy us and cause us suffering. He can injure us, take our things, cause poor health, lead us to question God's goodness and love for us, and God allows it.

So if our God is good and loving and has the perfect plan for our lives, the question remains: Why do we suffer? Why does He allow it? Is there a "good" reason for it? Can we find hope in the midst of it all? 

Next week: Why Do We Suffer? There IS a Purpose. 

(originally posted 7/29/20)

Why Do We Suffer? Is There Hope? Pt. 1

It isn’t fair. Children die of cancer. Drunk drivers kill innocent people. Families are torn apart over petty things. Young husbands die leaving grieving wives and children. Devastating illness and disease. Wars, storms, earthquakes, famines. So much suffering.

If God is good and He cares about people; if He has it within His power to stop evil from harming us, disease from afflicting us, “bad things” from happening to us, then why doesn’t He? It doesn’t seem fair. He doesn’t seem fair. 

For Christians, the problem can be more difficult. I know people who are angry at God and have turned away from Him, rejecting Him completely because of suffering they experienced without any perceived reason for it. Shouldn’t Christians get a “pass” from the pain in this world since we believe and trust in Him? Shouldn't we be exempt since we are “good” people? Or at the very least shouldn't He give us a good reason for our misery? The answer is no. 

We are not exempt. We are just as vulnerable to pain and suffering in this world as anyone else. But if God is loving, kind, all-knowing, all-powerful, and in control of all things, why doesn’t He prevent these things from happening? Can any possible good come from our suffering?

In this series of blog posts, I share reflections on what I found in my own search for purpose through the suffering I experienced. Why do we suffer, and is there any real reason for it? Follow along as I share my thoughts. Perhaps you will find help and hope in the midst of your own adversity.

When suffering crashes in on our own personal world, we begin to question what we know about God. We challenge His abilities and motives. We think maybe He isn’t so good, and perhaps He really doesn’t care about what happens to me, or even worse, maybe I am just a pawn waiting in fear for the next slap of pain to hit. If we believe God is responsible for the suffering we encounter, then we begin to question whether He is who He says He is. His entire character and words come under scrutiny, and in effect, we can conclude that God is actually cruel and a liar, unworthy to be trusted. But is He? Could there be a purpose in our suffering?

To understand suffering, we have to go back to the beginning of humanity. The primary reason we experience pain is the fact that we live in a fallen, imperfect world.  

In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve were created in perfection by a loving God. He provided a beautiful and abundant place for them to live and enjoy their eternal life with Him. They walked and talked with God, tended the gardens without sweat or difficulty, ate of its fruit, and undoubtedly enjoyed the animals who also resided there. Sin, sickness, death, and suffering had no part in it. It was truly paradise.

But then Satan entered the picture. As one of God’s most beautiful angelic creations, he became vain about his own beauty, and in his heart he desired God’s authority and position. As a result of his pride and rebellion, he and his legion of followers were thrown out of heaven. Since that day, Satan and his minions bring their hatred and destruction against all that God loves, primarily humans. 

In the garden, Satan spoke to Eve through a serpent, subtly questioning God’s goodness. Craftily weaving doubt and lies among partial truths, he deceived Eve into sin, followed by Adam who willfully disobeyed God’s rule regarding the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. As a result of their disobedience and sin, death entered the perfect world God had placed them in. They were cast out of Eden, forced to live out the remainder of their earthly days toiling for their existence and experiencing suffering for the first time. Life became a struggle, death inevitable.

One reason we suffer is simply because we were born into a fallen world where bad things happen, even to “good” people. One man and woman’s disobedience has affected every single human being throughout history. Is it fair that we have to suffer because they made bad choices thousands of years ago? Why should we have to go through pain and agony when we did not choose to eat of the forbidden fruit? Because every single day we do eat of the forbidden fruit. We sin within our hearts because we are imperfect. It is in our DNA because we are part of a fallen creation. Perhaps it’s not that we choose to be fallen, but we simply are fallen, and suffering is the consequence. 

It is not now, and never has been, God's desire for us to experience pain. We were not created for misery. But Adam and Eve were presented with a choice to obey or disobey and sadly, they failed. We now suffer because they suffered. It's our inheritance from human, frail, deceived parents. But God is a God of redemption, and in the midst of the worst torment, He always brings hope to those who seek Him. There is hope in the midst of suffering, and His purposes are perfect. If you are in the middle of a raging sea of pain and agony, keep looking to Him. He is the anchor holding you fast. 

Stay tuned for Part 2!

(originally posted 7/25/20)

 

Strangers and Aliens

“11 Dear friends, I warn you as “temporary residents and foreigners” [strangers and resident aliens] to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against your very souls. 12 Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.”  (1 Peter 2:11-12 New Living Translation) 

More than ever before I feel like I am an alien and stranger in my own world. As Christians, we do not live as the world lives, but we are still in this world. We live and play and shop and mingle every day with those around us. We have parties and celebrate each other's joyous occasions, and we cry and hug and share each other's sadness and grief. We connect on so many levels. We smile at strangers in the grocery aisle, maybe even chatting a few seconds about the weather or a bargain we see on the shelf. We meet friends for coffee at the local coffee shop. We gather to worship in church meeting halls

In the midst of this I remember that this world is not my home. The Apostle Peter says we are aliens and strangers in this world, and I feel it more acutely than ever. Earth is not my home; it is my temporary residential assignment. My true home is heaven, and I will be going there someday soon. This world is dying, and the prophesied end is getting closer every day. In the meantime, how am I living my life while stationed on planet Earth? Am I living it in such a way that reflects God’s love and goodness? Am I living so that others, unbelieving, may see God in me and find Him in these times of uncertainty? Am I living in such a way that when someone accuses me of wrongdoing, there will only be evidence of good? Who will be giving God glory on the day He comes because of what I have done with my life? 

I am an alien and stranger here. I should not be surprised that I feel like a foreigner. But while I am here, God has given me an assignment I need to fulfill. He has gifted and enabled me to do the things He calls me to do, and I want to be faithful to complete them. I share the things God puts on my heart, the things He convicts me of and wants to correct in my life because I know none of us are perfect. We are all a work in progress. We can all improve. But one thing I am sure of is this: when I do die, or if He comes while I am still alive, I will be going to my homeland– the place where I was ultimately created to be– the place you can be, too. 

If you do not know Jesus Christ, if you have not admitted you are a sinner and confessed that you can’t be saved by your own actions, if you need someone to cleanse your life and give you hope for a future in heaven, I beg you– please open your heart and ask God to save you. Believe in Jesus. Speak His name and ask Him to forgive you and to save you. Don’t wait. You do not know if you will die in the next hour, or if Jesus will come to take His followers to heaven soon. There is no second chance once you die. This life is temporary, the pleasures you think you have now, the self-sufficiency you hold to, will all disappear. He is the only Rock; the only strong foundation to stand on. Come to Jesus now, just as you are. He will take you and redeem you. You don’t have to quit this or that or change anything about yourself first. He loves you, and He waits for you to come.

This world is only a temporary residence for all of us. When this earthly life has ended, where will your permanent place– your forever home– be?

(originally posted 7/14/20)

What If?...Even If

Dead. My second baby was dead at nine months of age. His sister was seven months old when she died. It wasn’t fair. Even though we had a healthy three-year-old, I wanted the other two as well. Why did God allowed them to die? He wasn’t fair. 

I loved God and perceived Him to be good-- my Protector--but when my two children died after months of praying and believing for their healing, my faith in God was shattered. I felt unloved, punished, betrayed. But I hid it well.

Years later, my family moved to Slovenia to assist a missionary couple. Culture shock rocked my world, cracking open the tomb of putrid emotions I had buried all those years. Fear, lies, and anger all erupted to the surface dragging rejection, grief and loss with them. Severely broken, I needed help.  

It took months of counseling and spiritual warfare to heal my deeply wounded heart and emotions, and to counteract the lies Satan had fed me. The biggest wound to be repaired was the severed relationship with my Father God. In time, His love and power completely removed the death in my heart and our relationship was restored. I trusted Him with my life again. 

But… 

My one surviving child, Michael, was now an adult, but I still felt uneasy when he became ill. It was probably a normal maternal instinct, yet I knew I was vulnerable and loss a possibility. The scars from previous pain were bumped and sensitized whenever his safety was threatened. What if something happened to him? Could I, would I, trust God with my only remaining child? 

I wanted a quiet, safe life for my son. One that removed threats and kept him secure. But he and God had other plans. The day he joined the military seemed like an assault from God. "Why, when You know what I have already lost, would You lead him to join the Army and put himself into dangerous situations? Why would You threaten the safety of my only surviving child?" I knew Michael had to make his own decisions and live the life God called him to, but the day he left for boot camp, I sobbed. Was I destined to lose all of my children?

I wrestled with God once again. The Father I saw as loving and good was “threatening” me once again. Or was He? Restoration and healing had occurred after the first two losses and my faith was strong, but now it felt tested. Would I continue to trust Him no matter what came? What if Michael was deployed to a dangerous place? What if he was seriously wounded? What if he was killed? Would I still believe in God, follow Him and love Him if the most precious thing I had on earth was taken?

In the weeks that followed, I recalled stories of missionaries working in hostile foreign lands, their lives endangered. Many remained safe, but some were killed by those they brought the Gospel to. How did they reconcile this horrific pain with their faith in God? How could they hold fast to the hope of Jesus Christ when it cost them the most painful loss possible? 

Then I read about a missionary in similar danger. Natives wanted to kill him and his wife. In fact, they laid in wait, ready to burn them to death in their home. But the attack never came. One year later, testimony from the native chief revealed God's supernatural protection. The now-Christian chief told the missionary of the "hundreds of big men in shining garments with drawn swords circling the mission station," which led them to cancel the attack. The missionary's angelic protection far outnumbered the natives, and they were saved. (Missionary Protected By Angels, Today in the Word, MBI, October 1991, pg. 18)

There are other stories of natives poised to kill but couldn't because of God's intervention. Some had clubs raised, ready to bash in the missionary's head when he came through a doorway, but found they were unable to lower their arms as they were held up by some invisible and inexplicable force. God's intervention. Souls came to Christ as a result.

God has ordained the number of our days of life. He created us at the time He chose, and our death will be at the time of His choosing as well. My life, my husband's life, my son's life, his family's lives--all our lives--are in God's hands. There is no force on this earth who can take life from us until He allows and ordains it to be so. Whether we are engaged in dangerous careers, driving to the grocery store, or simply sitting in our recliners, our lives can end. 

What if the worst happens? Will I trust God with the most precious things I have on this earth? Or will I blame God and turn against Him, believing the lies of Satan that say God doesn't care, doesn't love me, or worse yet, is punishing and abandoning me? 

What if sickness and death come? What if I am bankrupt and have nothing material left on this earth? What if I am shunned and have no friends? What if...? What will I do with God in the "what ifs" of my life? 

Even if. Turning to God and trusting in Him changes everything. Loss and death are a part of this fallen world and will always be present in our lives at one time or another, in one way or another. It is unavoidable. The question is, what will we do with it? If we turn to God and bring all the pain and heartache to Him, He can take the what ifs and lead our hearts to say even if. Even if sickness and death come, even if I am bankrupt and have nothing, even if I am shunned and stand alone....even if. 

Even if the worst thing I imagine happens, I will trust God. I will choose to believe His Word, His unfailing kindness, and His love for me. I will choose to believe He is watching over me and has a perfect plan for my life. His ways are beyond my understanding. He sees the whole picture, the completed tapestry. He sees and acts from the viewpoint of eternity, and I only see from this fraction of earthly time. Will I choose to trust Him completely, giving Him full control over all the areas of my life? I must if I am to find and remain in peace. I must if I truly do love and believe in Him. 

Death and disaster are a painful reality in our world. They affect all of us. When the "what ifs" of life confront you, go to God and respond with "even if". Tell your own heart about God's goodness and His plan for your life. Tell your own heart the truths in His word and refute the lies of Satan that seek to drive you away from God. 

Even if your heart is broken and all seems lost, the One who knows you best and holds all of life in His hand will mend your shattered dreams. Even if you feel you can't go on, choose to believe. Through tears and sobs of anguish, choose to believe. Through all the pain this life can bring, choose to believe. 

"What ifs" bring doubt and fear. "Even ifs" bring hope and faith. The next time the devil whispers, "what if..." in your ear, shout back, "EVEN IF", because our God is bigger than anything that comes our way. His love is greater, His mercy and grace all encompassing. He will never leave or fail us when we trust Him with our lives. Run to Him and believe. 

(originally posted 7/9/20)

 

 

Am I Being Carried Away?

Hours. Hours and hours spent watching TV or having my cell phone in hand. Literally hours. First thing in the morning get coffee then check Facebook, email, and the weather. Drink coffee, walk the dog, check the phone or computer. Hours. Fit in a little Bible reading or writing scripture passages, then check the phone or computer. 

As I typed my previous post about the Sabbath, (Ten Little Rules), God whispered in my ear, “Thou shall have no other gods before me.” OK. I feel another correction coming on. “But God, I don’t serve other gods. I’m not a Buddhist or Muslim or even an atheist; I testify to serving only you.”  

My heart felt God’s reply. Hmm…consider all the time you spend on the things of this world. Consider what or who is the first thing you go to when you get up in the morning. What always draws your attention and pulls you in? What are you willing to bypass to get to something “more enticing.” What are you obsessed with? What has bewitched you?  

I looked up the definition of “bewitched” since I felt God had dropped that word into my heart. According to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, bewitched means “controlled or affected by or as if by a magic spell.” When I looked at synonyms, "entranced" came up and the definition caught my attention. Entranced means “to carry away with delight, wonder, or rapture.” It also means “power or permission to enter; the means or place of entry.” When I am bewitched by something, I give permission for whatever it is to enter my life and carry me away. It may seem delightful and wondrous at the time, but is it really that wonderful when it takes God’s rightful place in my life and carries me farther away from Him? Is it so great when it leads my heart to despair and frustration instead of peace?

My life feels controlled by social media. It affects my time, my emotions and my mental health. While there can be positives to these means of connection with others, it should not come before God. He is a jealous God wanting no one and nothing to come before Him and become a god in my life. He knows that the things of this world--the things we put before Him in our lives--will never bring the good He has for us.

I John 2:4 says, “If someone says, ‘I belong to God,’ but doesn’t obey God’s commandments, that person is a liar and does not live in the truth.” (NLT) I do not want to be a liar. I want to live in the truth. Therefore, I need to obey God in all things, starting with the Ten Commandments. I want to fully belong to Him.

God has been awakening my heart to areas I fall short in. He is calling me to a closer relationship with Him, and to walk in a manner that reflects Him. I claim to follow Him, but has my life shown it? Have I allowed the entrance of other gods into my life, pushing Him to a lesser place in favor of temporal things that carry me away? I don’t want to be “carried away.” I want to be closer to God; to hear Him say, “well done, good and faithful servant.”  I want to experience Him in my life so fully that no matter what happens in this world, I have His peace.

I do not want any other gods in my life. I want the one true God and for Him to be first in my life. How about you? Have other things or people entered your life and carried you away from putting God first in your life? Have other things bewitched you? I challenge you to examine your heart and then let God reveal areas He wants to purify. It won’t be easy, but the enchantment of those things will lose all their attraction when we see clearly the glory of God and experience His life-giving peace. 

(originally posted 7/1/20)

Ten Little Rules

Ever had a time when God dropped something into your mind and you thought, “Oh. Okay. That was interesting. I wonder what that’s about?” I have.

One day while walking my dog, I heard God say these words: “Six days shalt thou labor.” I don’t often hear such clear, distinct directives from God, but there it was. I didn’t have to think very hard to know what He was referring to. Over the years I have allowed work, shopping, and other things to encroach on God’s Sabbath day—the one set aside as a holy day—a day of rest. And not unlike the proverbial frog dropped in a pan of cool water which was gradually heated until he was cooked, my observance of the Lord’s Day had slowly given way to shopping and “little” chores around the house, to full-fledged home projects which consumed the entire day. It had become easy to make the seventh day of the week just another day. So when I heard those words in my ear, I knew He was speaking to me.

Every day for a week I heard the same words, “Six days shalt thou labor,” and every day I began to tell God I understood and would honor the coming Sunday as a day of rest. But as each Sunday came, there were errands to run and tasks to do—especially since we had just moved into a new home that needed work. My husband worked 50+ hours a week, and we still had the other unsold home to maintain with lawn work, so his at-home work hours were very limited. How could we possibly get everything done on one weekend day? Three Sundays went by and work was done, all the while my head kept hearing those same words reverberate: “Six days shalt thou labor.”

I told God I understood, but did He? Did He know all we needed to get done with the new and the old house? Did He realize how quickly those hours of the day go by? Of course He knew all those things. Of course He knew how tired my husband was after a long, stressful week and how dividing chores over two days was better than one. But He also knew how tired and stressed my husband was, and how desperately he needed to rest body, mind, and soul. He knew how truly insignificant those “things” are that we strive to get done at the cost of our health--physical, mental, and spiritual.

Again the words came but expanded. “Six days shalt thou labor and do all thy work. Honor the Sabbath day and keep it holy.”  Okay. Okay! This Sunday I won’t work, but that means I have to tell Rob not to work either. I wondered how that would be received since God didn’t tell him that.

Sunday morning came. As we walked our dog after morning coffee, Rob began to list the things he wanted to get accomplished. “Honey,” I began, “God has spoken to me for over a month saying, ‘Six days shalt thou labor and do all thy work.’” Then I proceeded to tell him how we could do some minor jobs around the house if he wanted to. His response: “No way! Not after what you just said.” He almost seemed a little happy! Maybe he does need the rest—maybe he wanted the rest but felt he couldn’t ask for it.

I am not a perfect. I strive to please God, to seek forgiveness for the sins I commit and the ways I fail Him every single day. When God recently brought “six days” into my life, I realized something. I thought I was doing a pretty good job of being a Christ-follower, but then I realized I wasn’t even obeying the Ten Commandments! Ten little rules. 

Our focus tends to be on the “big ones”:  murder, committing adultery, bearing false witness. You know... the “obvious” ones; the ones easiest to avoid. But when God hit me between the eyes with commandment number four, I realized I was not as obedient as I thought. Greater conviction came when I realized I had disobeyed for years without it even really bothering me.

I wasn’t resting or honoring or keeping the Sabbath day holy as He had commanded. I could look around me and see thousands of other people doing work on Sunday and try to justify my actions, but He was speaking to my heart.

Someone recently posted a meme on Facebook which stated we have thousands of laws on the books all because we can’t obey Ten Rules on stone. A quick search led to this:

“No one knows how many laws there are in the United States.  Apparently, no one can count that high.”

“They’ve been accumulating, of course, for more than 200 years.  When federal laws were first codified in 1927, they fit into a single volume.  By the 1980s, there were 50 volumes of more than 23,000 pages.”

"New laws mean new crimes. From the start of 2000 to 2007, Congress had created at least 452 new crimes, so that at the time the total number of federal crimes exceeded 4,450." 

(Kowal Communications, Inc. Blog)

“New laws mean new crimes.” Of course. The more you make anything against the law, the more likely it is someone will violate that law. It’s sad that we have come to this. All we had to do was follow ten little rules, but because we don’t, we now have thousands and thousands of laws in place telling us what we can and can’t do. Isn’t the root need for all these laws because we broke or ignored the original ten?

In addition, God said we needed a day to rest. He knew how crazy our world and lives would be. He knew the stress and busyness. He knew the toll it would take on health, sanity, and relationships. He knew we needed a day to simply rest. God Himself rested after He made all of creation in six days. I think it’s probably important for us, too.

But it goes beyond needing rest. In honoring the Sabbath and keeping it holy, we acknowledge who God is. It’s submission to His Lordship. He is our King and we need to honor and worship Him on the day that He Himself has established. 

Will I submit my will to Him, even when I see a huge “to do” list in front of me and have few hours to complete it? Will I recognize that worshiping and spending time with Him is more important than any earthly thing I may need to accomplish? Will I open my eyes to see that when I place Him first, He will enable me to finish the things on my list? If I spend my time resting and honoring and worshiping, my work hours will become more fruitful as He enables, and perhaps are re-prioritized to what He sees as most important. 

Since God spoke to my heart about honoring the Sabbath, my husband and I have made the effort to not work or go shopping on Sunday and it has helped us focus more on God and His word, as well as simply relax and rest. Do we still struggle? Yes, because old habits are hard to break. But God has brought to our attention our disobedience of one of God's 'ten little rules" and now we strive to align ourselves more to His will and commands.

God is always working to conform us more and more to His image. He prods and corrects us when we need it because He is a loving Father who seeks to keep us from harm and to align us with His plans and purpose. The Ten Commandments aren't restrictive, they are God's boundaries of safety and well-being. It's never too late to begin anew. I encourage you to examine your own heart to see what God may be speaking to you. 

Just this week He dropped another of the “Big Ten” into my heart. Let the refining continue!

(Originally published 6/24/20)

 

 

Life's Tapestry

Have you ever seen a tapestry hanging in a museum or grand manor home? Their intricacy and detail are exquisite. Many look like fine oil paintings instead of woven thread. 

For centuries these pieces of artwork were handcrafted on looms. Multiple vertical threads called warp, are attached to the top and bottom of the loom. They remain stable and unmoving, the backbone of the tapestry. Colored silk or wool horizontal threads called weft, are woven in and among the vertical warp threads at the moment they are needed to create the design the artist envisioned. Some areas of the tapestry require tiny bites of one color, while other sections require multiple rows of a specific color in order for the picture to form. Each piece is handcrafted and unique. No two are exactly alike.

Our lives can be compared to a tapestry. Each of us is unique and handcrafted by the Master Weaver. No two of us are the same. Everything we experience, feel, think, and do are unique to each individual. Woven over days and years, each of these things are worked into our life's tapestry as they come. 

During difficult times, our tapestry is woven with very dark thread. If the event was short-lived, fewer threads are incorporated into the overall pattern. Devastating, life-altering events create a larger, more pronounced, darkened area. The darkest threads may continue to be interspersed throughout the years of weaving as memories of a painful time recur, and that painful time is touched upon again.

Joyful, happy, grateful, celebrated times are woven in as bright, cheerful bursts of color. And there are occasional threads of gold. These threads were added during moments when we needed a special touch from Him. Times when His presence was not seen or felt, but His hand was there.

Tapestries varied in size, and just like them, our lives vary in length. Whether a few short weeks in a mother’s womb, or a life that spans over a century, when death comes their tapestry is complete. There is no unfinished business with God, no incomplete tapestry. He completes the work He begins. Each design, each life, is conceived and then accomplished according to His purpose.

In the midst of it all is God, the “warp” thread, holding the entirety of our lives together. He is the backbone of our tapestry, and He is interwoven throughout each moment we have breath. He is the Master Weaver and Creator. He knit us together as we were formed in our mother’s wombs, and He is the One constant presence throughout our lives.

We cannot see the finished pattern being created in our lives. We only see the backside of the tapestry. Knots and crossed threads that look messy, with no pattern or purpose. Only after death can we see the completed work--the beautiful front side our of our unique tapestry. In the end, we see that all the black threads--all of the pain, the sadness, the loss, the grief--have had their purpose. They make all of the good--the happy times, the joyful events, the healthy times, the triumphs and victories--stand out and shine more brightly. Those bright colors and events draw our eyes and our attention, with all of the darkness falling into the backdrop. If the sharp contrast did not exist, the beauty of the bright times would seem somewhat blah. 

When completed, these tapestries, whether dark or bright, infinitesimally detailed or covered in large swaths of singular color, reflect the woven image of a life lived.

The Master Artist is creating a masterpiece in your life. It will be a reflection of His care, His love and His heart. If you have not invited Him into your life, please do. All the messy tangles of your life can be re-woven, all the darkness become meaningful. Ask Him into your life--into your tapestry--today. He loves you.

(originally posted 6/16/20)